This article was written by The Zillennial Zine’s spring editorial intern Alexandrea Ciardella. Find her on Instagram at @a6ysma1. If you would like to share an article with The Zillennial, send us an email at thezillennialzine@gmail.com.
Quiet quitting has become a popular phrase in the workplace. It’s the act of doing the absolute minimum work required from your job while putting in no additional effort. It takes on different forms depending on the type of job- maybe you refuse to spend any extra time in the workplace than necessary, or don’t attend optional meetings. The “quiet quitting” meaning has taken on a new definition since the beginning of the pandemic, but what does it mean to quietly quit a relationship?
Quiet quitting, or quiet dumping, in a relationship may involve disengagement from one another, which could include emotional indifference or distance from your partner or friend. Instead of finding joy in being in each other’s company, you find that you are only hanging onto the relationship for the sake of the relationship. It may also include downgraded involvement in the relationship. Though quiet quitting is infamous amongst romantic relationships, some have found that it can extend to friendships as well. Maybe you feel like you’re the only one putting in effort into the relationship, or you find that you are spending less and less time with your partner. Quiet quitting isn’t a new phenomenon in relationships, though this new label for the action is accurate.
Quiet quitting has been proven to be harmful in relationships as the person who was “quit” always wonders who was to blame; whether it was because they were not enough, or if it was their partner’s fault. In the last few years, the phenomenon has grown exponentially in friendships and romantic relationships. Some researchers believe that because of phone calls, video calls, chat messages, and more, it is more difficult to connect with people or even tell when someone is quietly quitting a relationship.
While quiet quitting is a great way to set boundaries in the workplace, quiet quitting relationships has a negative effect on personal relationships. Keeping your relationship, whether platonic or romantic, away from your self-identity can be harmful.
A few signs of quiet quitting in a relationship includes;
Communication Issues
Whether emotionally or verbally, one or both parties seem to have issues with communicating what they want in the relationship. This extends to issues with attention as well; how much attention you pay to your partner or friend can be an indicative factor of how your relationship is going. If you feel like the other party isn’t paying you enough attention, you may find yourself in a quiet quitting relationship.
Avoiding Conflict
Even though this may seem like the opposite of a sign, avoiding conflict means that the other party isn’t interested in maintaining the relationship. As your relationship is not of the utmost importance to them, they ignore issues instead of repairing any rifts. This may mean dismissal whenever you try to engage in a serious conversation with them or walking away from any serious conflicts. The bottom line is, they’ve stopped engaging with you and no matter what you say to them, they just don’t find it interesting.
Affection
In both platonic and romantic relationships, a decrease in affection plays a huge role in relationships. Less actions like hugging, kissing, or spending quality time together indicates that your friend or partner doesn’t value the relationship as much. Every relationship is different, and maybe you aren’t as affectionate in one relationship compared to another, but if you notice a significant decrease in affectionate actions, you may be in a quietly quitting relationship.
Don’t lose hope if you think you’re in the quiet quitting stage of your relationship. Here are some things that might help.
Open Communication
Speak directly to your partner about what you want. Pay attention to them, hear what they have to say, and show that you are listening. Make sure that your partner also listens to what you have to say.
Acts of Kindness
In a romantic relationship, these are referred to as ‘relationship rituals’. Spend time with one another; go out to lunch, see a movie together.
Appreciation
Showing that you appreciate your partner or friend and what they do in the relationship allows them to respond with appreciation in turn. This allows higher relationship commitment and provides more joy when you are around them.
We hope this article helped you find a quiet quitting meaning! Have you ever experienced this?
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