Music, Pop Culture

Sabrina Carpenter’s Witty EP Gives The Best Holiday Advice

Sabrina Carpenter Fruitcake ranking

This article was written by The Zillennial Zine’s fall editorial intern Jess Newman. Find her on Instagram at @_jess_n_. If you would like to share an article with The Zillennial, send us an email at

We all know by now that Miss Sabrina Carpenter has a way with words. She went viral on her Emails I Can’t Send Tour for changing the lyrics at the end of Nonsense to go along with the city she was in. They were so funny and showed she is quick on her toes. Then she released A Nonsense Christmas last year in December and it was a smash hit. It made sense (pun intended) for her to release more holiday songs. Her EP, Fruitcake, dropped on Friday and she did not disappoint. Here is my Sabrina Carpenter fruitcake ranking.

1. “buy me presents”

This song is my favorite because it’s riddled with Christmas analogies, so much so that you might not catch all of them on the first listen. It’s the Christmas way to say if a man wanted to, he would and if your man isn’t treating you need to kick him to the curb. This is the only explicit song on the EP, but it is way less suggestive than A Nonsense Christmas. My favorite lyric is the opening line of the song, “If you were a wise man, baby, you would drop / Every other ho, ho, ho and put me on top.”

2- “is it new years yet?”

When I first heard this song I immediately heard the 70s feel like Dua Lipa’s Future Nostalgia album. I love this song because it’s not the typical romantic song you typically hear around the holidays. I’m sure everyone who is single can relate to this song. She talks about how she’s lonely on the holidays and she can’t wait for it to be New Year’s. The second verse is so so so good. It’s very punchy almost like she is sing rapping. It’s also in this verse that she references the EP title by saying “Fruitcake just makes me sick”. My favorite line from this song has got to be “Couples all around me, damn, it hurts/Wanna push ’em in the fireplace, and watch ’em burn / Santa, Santa, why do you hate me? / I’m a gift, look how God made me”. Sabrina Carpenter is a lyrical genius who kills it every time by infusing her sass right into her songs.

Teen Vogue Singing GIF by Sabrina Carpenter - Find & Share on GIPHY

3. “A Nonsense Christmas”

This song is the most suggestive on the EP and for that it lands on the naughty list. Even though it is so suggestive it’s cheeky and fun at the same time. We know the melody already which makes it an easy listen. My favorite lines of this song are, “You’re my wish list / Lookin’ at you got me thinkin’ Christmas / Snowflakes in my stomach when we’re kissin’.”

4. “santa doesn’t know you like i do”

This song reminded me of “Last Christmas” with the electronic keyboard and the tempo. Sabrina sings to her love interest saying that she can make their Christmas better. This song is relatable for anyone who has tried to convince someone to be with them. You can offer anyone the world and they can still leave out in the cold. My favorite lyrics come from the outro, “Well, maybe this Christmas time / You’ll finally realize that I could be the one / To give you everything you want”.

Hair Bedroom GIF by Sabrina Carpenter - Find & Share on GIPHY

5. “cindy lou who”

This song is written directly to the new girl in your ex’s life. It hits home for anyone who has had an ex move on faster than they did. It’s so common for us to think we lack something or for us to believe the new love of their life is better than us. That’s never the case, but these feelings can hit harder during the holidays when it seems like everyone is all coupled up and having the time of their lives. My favorite line in this song is “There’s red and green everywhere, but I’m so blue / Cindy Lou Who.”

6. “white xmas”

This is Sabrina’s nod to the classics. It’s her take on “White Christmas” with a little snippet of “Jingle Bells” at the very end. Her vocals sound angelic. This track rounds out the EP beautifully.

Angry Why Me GIF by Sabrina Carpenter - Find & Share on GIPHY

I love that this EP is 5 originals with one remix of a classic. Christmas has been around for a long time and we need some new classics! This EP is even better than I imagined. I definitely think it needs to be added to your Christmas playlist. It will be on mine! If you need any more holiday song recommendations, check out this article.

This is my Sabrina Carpenter Fruitcake ranking, what’s yours? Do you have a new holiday favorite on this album? Let us know in the comments!

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